Sorta Prose,
Sorta Poetry
Announcing Library News
at the Annual Meeting, 2003
Now it’s time to talk about
And with good memories inside, we
should mention with pride those who went over to the other side:
Erva has always been in a Rieske
business, but now she will take a trek
across the LAO deck within the bibliotheque from being Secretary Exec to helping with Human Resources, that’s a euphemism for
Employment Forces, a term inspiring
that means hiring and firing.
Heybron, the master of the phrase
and the quote, gave himself an antidote for all that inquiring by retiring.
Since Bob Maxwell got together his facts well, having written a guide on how to abide with authority work, (though it’s easy to see, many rebel against authority), anyway what I’m trying to
point toward is that Bob received
the Highsmith Library Literature
Award. This honor happened one day real pronto at the
Olsen, comma, Chris, we shall miss, as he moves from Interlibrary Loan to a more northerly zone,
He’s going to get his professional kicks
in a place we used to call Ricks. At
BYU of
Roger McFarland has moved himself
and his recollections from part-time in Special Collections, to a full-time
slot he got in Access Service, a euphemism that should make
you nervous. No way he can relax: his job is to manage the stacks.
I know not if Sorensen, comma
Ti'Ata, drives a Miata, but she is moving smartly from partly-time to
full-time, earning an extra dime
from the LAO budget miser as the new
ILL Borrowing Supervisor.
Och hvad ska vi säga om Dorie
ThomSEN (Assistenta i Departmentet av Circulationarna)? Hon ska gå från
He who manages the circulating of
each book was given a second look by the BYU Evening MBA
program. To the library Andy Spackman will come back, man, but not in
the PM every per diem the normal way, ‘cuz he’s studying
for the MBA.
The department Assistant for Excess
Services, Jennifer Stoker, married some bloker named Hope less than a week
after the demise of one of those
great guys, Bob Hope. So are things
hopeless now? Nope! Jennifer will tell you, there’s always new Hope. The Hope name reminds me: one of our former
catalogers, Anne Hope, is now in
Marv Wiggins, whose first bicycle
was built by JC Higgins, went on a tear as Social Science Department Chair, and
that lasted 17 years. It’s over, so now we can shed our tears.
But there are always new mountains to climb, so he shall do the thing divine:
become Interim Coordinator of the Information Literacy Section and Chair of the
LIIL Committee. He’s never been to
If
Brenda Harrison, on the Office
Professionals Advisory Committee (o-p-a-c) reminds us: OPAC is an acronym and synonym for more than just an online catalog. Brenda endured the building of another home with builders straight out of Mad
Max and ThunderDome.
Management and Econ has undergone
change, whereupon, Jared Howland became Department Assistant, coexistent and
equidistant from Science Ref, where his wife Shiloh puts on a similar show to
and fro. Jared will stress progress toward the MLS by studying through the online nexus of the University of North Texas,
and hopes by being utilitarian to grow up to be a real live librarian.
Speaking of real librarians who are
also committee experimentarians,
Kirk Memmott took a trek, oh my heck
to UCLA, USC, and Cal Tech to get
the specs on what is an “Information
Commons,” and learned from librarian grammarians that it is politically
incorrect and not a fair jab to call
it: “a glorified computer lab.”
Dianne King is serving full swing as
Federal Relations Liaison for ULA; I
can’t say what a Federal Relations
Liaison does, but she has been happily married for 43 years. She gets her kicks from picnics and
Mexican food, and so for her the perfect lark
would be chimichangas in the park.
What’s the mystery behind family
history? Howard Bybee was an artiste at attending conferences in the
East and then he flew without
further ado to the debut of his son’s wedding in
Kayla Willey was ULA President this
year. The topic she picked for the ULA
conference was: Catch the Big Information
Fish @ Your Library… (use hand gestures) Some of the related slogans that she wisely
rejected included the following: (1) “It Doesn’t Take a Brain Sturgeon to Know
Library Users Want Caviar;” (2) “Reel In Those Spotted Surf Suckers With
Internet Access;” and (3) “If Something is Rotten in the State of
Librarianship, There is About Zero Doubt Your Information Trout Have Been Out on the Shelf Too Long.”
This fall,
Sherry Wadham’s time in Music and
Dance is expiring, as she will be retiring at the end of October and moving over to a life of ease, if you please. For library perspective, it would be effective
but scary to talk to Sherry; her fix on library politics goes back as far as 1956.
Now let’s talk Science, which deals
with ions and sea lions and environmental non-compliance and dandelions, you
know, Science. Danielle Lawson, who’s awesome, is moving on up to the ominous Information Commonus.
Christensen, comma, John, whose
alter ego is Kenobi, comma, Obi-Wan,
and who often flies unseen to the planet of Tatooine, has agreed to assume
responsibility for the Sampler Room.
Willie Baer has been spun and spinned by the Information Commons whirlwind, enough to rotate him off
from Strategic Planning (sometimes
known as Futuristic Gold Panning or Lifetime Career Spanning). He’s also been involved in a caper involving a white paper on scholarly communications.
And now the time is near for you to cheer to the ionosphere
the most sincere and endearing news of the year!
Ta-ta-ta-da! It’s so exciting, I couldn’t even find a word to rhyme with
the new department name: “General
Services.” No longer need we plead for less specificity, less authenticity, more simplicity, more elasticity
than “General Reference.” I know you’ll
say: it’s an umbrella, fella, under
which a number of things can occur. I
concur. So now we can refer specifically
to “General Services.”
Don Howard was
tired, so he retired, and will have no problems with lumbago in
Thereupon,
And
Cyndee Frazier is the trayzhur who was insistent on becoming
Department Assistant last
November. Remember?
Meanwhile, Keith
Stirling, a whirling dervish, has
moved beyond database yields to
greener fields.
As this presentation further unravels, let’s talk about… travels. One of the scoops is
In May, they say,
This year, Allyson Washburn made a
virtual commute, and it was a beaut. She traveled to and fro from here to
Speaking of travel, Liz Litster, now
Liz Brimley, has gotten more than her share.
On military leave, I do believe, she is now in
For a conference,
Dick Hacken’s second cousin was just
buzzin’ with laughter, okey-dokey, when he sang Karaoke in
Okay, I’ll ask ya, who went to
Some drove themselves (not crazy,
just drove themselves). James Fairbourn
was road-worn after touring the
Speaking of Lyn,
let’s talk and spread blame, about
what’s goin’ on in the Periodicals game:
Lyn is now charged with the large
concatenation of Bindery Preparation.
An MLS, maybe I’ll try it, is the motto of Derrik Hiatt, who soon will learn library etiquette at the State University of
Southern Connecticut.
If you hear, like, a total
Swiss yodel, it may well come from the Scera Shell,
from the warbling vowels of
Andrea Howell, where the sounds of
the Alps are tingling scalps, each Friday in a mighty rendition of Heidi. Her next dramatic attack will be in the HFAC,
and then some day, Broadway!
While some of us deal with words, Kimberly Ha’o watches birds. It gave her a shiver near the
The consistent Department Assistant
of Humanities and Divinities, Department of Profanities and Infinities,
Department of Vanities and Vicinities, Department Assistant Joanne Wessel was a
strong enough vessel; yes, Joanne
began her clan, with daughter Amelia
joining the mix on July #6. Now she
and the babe are getting stronger, but she works for us no longer. Bishop, comma,
Christina, became the new queen a’
the department.
What other insanities in the area of
Human-inanities? Well, for a while
And take a peak at what Annick and Chris Ramsey have been
writing with a lot of fuss in
cooperation with Russ, Clement – it
is a book, and look, the time for it
to appear is near. It’s a
bio-bibliographical marvel, oh yeah,
on the Symbolist Followers of Gauguin.
As you might expect, you’d be correct in reckoning that offspring of
librarians are now serving on missions: in foreign climes like Korea and
California, some in Tacoma and Brazil running up and downhill, one in Tennessee, one in Calgary, one in the area of Bulgaria, others in Virginia and Taiwan, an Island where Basil Yang has gone, and the list goes on,
missionaries in Britain where Queen Liz is sittin’,
some in Mississippi or New Mexico, and for all I know, some in Lisbon and in Tokyo. For any that I missed, I expand the list to the western hemisphere and the
east, the southern and northern at the very least.
And then some of us without fail,
generally those more female than male, grew large with child which was
genetically styled and internally filed in a CPU until the child came due
and then popped out, no doubt; and one more sprout was added to the salad of
life.
Chelsea of
Circulation Desk fame, has given up
the library game, terminated her
employ for two bundles of joy,
taken the spin to
have twins. On August First, in a burst of activity marked by a
proclivity for reproductivity, she
had a matched set, you bet, a duet able to wet
twice the quota of Pampers.
Amanda Davis was manager of the
Stacks to the max until the impacts of pregniosity moved her to
say, “The first Day of September is my last blast from the
John Finlay walked around thinly
while his wife took on a load that growed
and growed and become a jumble of joy,
a baby boy, Joshua, born in January. John, Joshua, January.
But the list of acquisitions can not
be stopped, for
Annalee Zeidner also had a baby insiden her, and that baby girl came
out named Miriam, who was received with happy delirium, and Annalee no longer does our designing, but instead she was resigning,
and she and hubby Tim, that is, she and him, or him and Annalee, moved to
Now that about covers a portion of
one generation of regeneration, it
reproduces a listing of one year's reproduction (excuse me if I missed your son
or daughtah, as I should notta oughta)…
and please don't make me make a list of grandkids, each of which is smarter than the median, and is always obedient
and is sure to set the record for cuteness
and astuteness. Please don't make me make a list: I estimate more
than two hundred… so go and tell your neighbors and friends without end
about your genetic prosperity as
displayed in your very own posterity.
And as for those of
us without little kids… That has
certain benefids.
And
now… what fun… that we are done.